Your Job Sucks
We’ve smelled your tears. Have you considered other opportunities like the one you’re taking now? Perhaps this is the start of a magical journey, or maybe it is. To start, tell us a little about what you do so we can - like - help you or something. No promises.
Let's Get Personal
Enter your job below and we’ll use scientific and mathematical formulas to reveal the root cause of your occupational-angst.
“Oh damn, you’re a(n) ?
It’s no wonder you hate your job. Your job is the literal worst.”
There are plenty of people who love their less lame jobs. Let’s have a look:
Job Survival Strategies
Quitting is for quitters. You’re no quitter; you’re an unsung hero of the modern age. Before handing in your resignation, consider these excellent Job Survival Tactics. They work at least some of the time, guaranteed.
The Perfect Excuse
Don’t let work stand in the way of doing what you want any longer. Those days are gone, friend. Get out of your next dreaded shift with any one of these printable, usable, and totally believable, illegitimate documents.
Keeping your frustration buried deep down inside is one of the leading causes of heart disease and poor motor skills. In the textbox below, call your boss or annoying coworkers anything from a "bawdy bat-fowling apple-john" to a "mewling flea-bitten dewberry" and we will provide you with an alternative phrase you can use to avoid getting fired. Let your imagination run wild!
CHEAPEST THERAPY EVER
Performing a job you hate has a tendency to make everything feel damp and hopeless. Therapy is too expensive. You can’t eat your feelings forever, either. Click the button below to make everything great again:
Plan B: Arson
Burn everything to the ground. Feel the therapeutic warmth of the flames as they light your face in an eerie glow. First, play a calming song by Lorde or Lana Del Ray, and select your firestarting method below:
Choose your Firestarter:
PLAN YOUR ESCAPE
Your future isn’t as dismal as it seems. You probably just haven’t “found yourself” yet. Follow along and soon enough, you’ll be seeing that bright future of yours shining like a diamond. Believe.
Entrepreneurs are pretty dope. They’ve got passion, and fire, and a strong sense of self. Just like you! They also don't have to deal with "the Man" because they BECOME "the Man" or "the Woman" or [the gender identity of your choosing] proceeded by 'the' with heavy quotation marks.
Your life wouldn't be satisfying without a dose of style. You know how to slay, and you've got a knack for trends. You may have been compared to a Kardashian recently, or maybe a British Royal. It's time for you to share your flare for fashion with the masses. You could help people look flossy and help them feel confident and self-assured. Time for a career in style stream.
You've got a cool head and the confidence of a tiger shark. That makes you a perfect fit for a technical job in the medical field. Not only do you get to help people, but you also get to use tools and tinker with things. Who doesn't love to tinker? These professionals make a difference - and that's admirable AF.
The More You Know...
Fun Facts about Opticians:
Bendable, Flexible, Versatile
When you're an optician, you get options, You can be an entrepreneur. You can focus on style. You can master the technical side. Whatever path you choose, you can wear a lot of different metaphorical hats. You can also wear a lot of actual hats, we recommend fedoras.
The Happiest People Ever
99% of Opticians consider themselves 'joyful' and 'over the moon' about their career. It would have been 100%, but there is this one guy named Gerry. Don't pay attention to Gerry, he's a miserable sod and was hungry at the time of our survey.
Riches Beyond Your Wildest Dreams
You won't have to make the tough decision between whether you should buy groceries or having running electricity this month. You can have it all! Opticians make more money than you. Once you're an optician, you can take a deep bath in all your loonies and toonies. So Bougie!
A rewarding and lucrative career is only as far away as a well filled-out application form and a thirst for something better. Plus, there are plenty of different schools that offer Optical programs, including these fine institutions:
- Douglas College Dispensing Optician
- Georgian College Opticianry Program
- Seneca College Opticianry Program
- Northern Alberta Institute of Technology Optical Sciences Program
- Northern Alberta Institute of Technology Optical Sciences Program (French)
- Oulton College Optician Program
- College Communautaire de Nouveau Brunswick - Techniques d'orthèses visuelles
- Stenberg College Dispensing Optician Diploma Program
The great thing is, the programs only take a few years time — and your diploma comes with options. Being an optician combines healthcare, technology, fashion, entrepreneurship, and service with plenty of career opportunities as a regulated health care professional.
Best of all, you will no longer feel compelled to visit websites like this.
Coping Strategies for Success
Reading isn’t only for nerds and hobbits, it’s also for smart people. Like you! Reading helps to increase overall happiness, so why not complement this career breakthrough with a book to help navigate you through your impending success.
We Love Ours!
We also love eyes, glasses, and contact lenses. We also like contact lens solution and, occasionally, sunglasses. We’re the unsung heroes of vision care, and we think you deserve to love your job as much as we do. As you can tell, we’re also really fun and great to be around. If you’d like to be fun and great to be around — we recommend you join us.
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